Welcome to Delicious or Distressing, where we rate recent food memes, videos, and other decidedly unserious news. Last week we discussed the troubling rise of ‘WaterTok.’
When I watched the unintentionally hilarious video of Le Creuset’s new colorway unveiling, my online mind couldn’t help but immediately conjure Daniel Craig’s viral introduction of Saturday Night Live’s musical guest. “Ladies and gentlemen,” he says with a tone of equal parts reverence and resignation, “the Weeknd.” But here, instead of Daniel Craig, a man from Le Creuset in a small barren space; instead of the Weeknd, “shallot.” The crowd oohs and ahhs as another person somewhat unceremoniously rips a large piece of shipping paper to reveal the brand’s latest purple-ish, allium-inspired hue, and the whole thing feels ripe for a meme.
Meanwhile, Love Is Blind contestants are alleging that the show runners deprived them of food and encouraged excessive drinking—in an industry intent on ruthlessly mining its contestants for content and out-of-context soundbites, the claims are both unfortunate and unsurprising. (The production company has denied them.) H&H Bagels in New York is selling pre-sliced, pre-schmeared bagels to circumvent a tax that, unbeknownst to literally everyone, hikes the price of bagels sliced and schmeared to order. Lastly, King Charles’ coronation meal is…drum roll please…quiche. According to a tweet from his former chef, “The King loves anything with eggs and cheese,” and truthfully, I’m right there with him.
Here’s everything else new in food internet culture this week.
Love Is Blind, the hit Netflix dating show, is in the news again, and this time it’s not for the on-air drama. Previous contestants claimed to Insider that they were deprived of basic necessities like food, water, and adequate sleep. According to previous cast members like Danielle Ruhl from Season 2, contestants frequently ran out of water (surprisingly, those sinks in the lounge area by the pods don’t work). Ruhl also says she witnessed the women fight over a single hard-boiled egg. Bleak! And oftentimes, when these contestants requested more water, they were given additional alcohol to consume courtesy of the producers. Briana Holmes from Season 1 stated that when she asked for water, she was given some—plus four bottles of alcohol. Kinetic Content, the production company, has denied these claims of mistreatment: The wellbeing of our participants is of paramount importance to Kinetic,” it told Insider.
The thing is, American reality dating shows push alcohol consumption like no other. MTV’s Are You the One, and ABC’s The Bachelor are full of alcohol-splashed scenes, and a previous Bachelor contestant has said producers constantly refill their glasses. Whatever happened to putting people’s needs first before they faint in front of the camera? Well, the lack of basic needs like food, water, and sleep plus a seemingly unlimited amount of complimentary alcohol is an ideal concoction for the unhinged, erratic behavior the producers are probably looking for. But if the show can afford to produce five whole weddings each season, it can surely afford some catering. At least give the people more eggs. 5/5 distressing. —Julia Duarte, art assistant
Did you know New York City taxes its bagels? Well, only bagels that have been cream cheesed, sliced, buttered, or otherwise prepared in some way. It’s referred to as a sandwich tax and it adds 8.875% to your bagel bill. Originally enacted during the Depression, the tax was meant to keep groceries cheaper while taxing restaurants. Somehow it’s managed to stick around, sneakily making our bagels that much more expensive—until now. H&H Bagels in New York City has found a loophole: injecting bagels with cream cheese. Much as I love finding ways around the law, I have some objections. First, we’re injecting plain cream cheese into bagels? I’m yawning, I’m asleep, I’ve been dead for a hundred years. Second, these bagels are warmed for two minutes? Where is the toast? Where is the crunch? NPR’s Jonathan Gould rated the tax-free bagel a 3/10, and I’m following his lead. I’m rating this one 1.5/5 delicious. —Sam Stone, staff writer
Remember a couple of years ago when Staples revealed its new logo? It was… a whole event. Well, when Le Creuset revealed its new color Shallot earlier this week, it felt like a similarly dramatic, albeit smaller vibe. The products were hidden behind a curtain made of craft paper—ripped to reveal a shallot-colored floral wonderland. My first thought was, “Do I need a Shallot French press?” Sure, the whole collection is giving Zoolander’s Magnum look. But if my partner’s Bodum French press were to suddenly, mysteriously disappear, then surely I could justify this purchase. I mean, it would match most of Le Creuset’s current line of colors. You know, if I ever wanted to turn my kitchen into a Le Creuset showroom. 4/5 delicious for good color coordination. — Esra Erol, senior social media manager